What’s the difference between a 15 inch pizza and a musician?
The pizza can feed a family of four.
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Q: What’s the difference between an orchestra and a freight train?
A: A freight train needs a conductor!
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Q: How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Twelve. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it better.
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I went up into the attic and found a Stradivarius and a Rembrandt.
Unfortunately
Stradivarius was a terrible painter and Rembrandt made lousy violins.
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These are just great. The author, Steve Howard, is one of the UK’s leading sax and clarinet techs and quite literally wrote the Haynes manuals for maintaining these instruments!
http://www.shwoodwind.co.uk/Notes/jazz_etiquette_solos.htm
http://www.shwoodwind.co.uk/Notes/jazz_etiquette_dress.htm
http://www.shwoodwind.co.uk/Notes/jazz_etiquette_listeners.htm
http://www.shwoodwind.co.uk/Notes/jazz_etiquette_admin.htm
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Q: How does a jazz musician end up with 1 million dollars?
A: By starting with 2 million dollars.
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Saw this in Dublin a couple of weeks ago…
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In Dublin? That comes as quite a surprise! In Dublin, there’re buskers EVERYWHERE — and many very good ones, too!
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Q: What do you call a jazzman without a girlfriend?
A: Homeless!
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