Cool, I’ll drink one on you 
That’s weird and shouldn’t happen. Something for @Benjamin, @noris.
You can turn off update on the server, but it would keep nagging you, which is annoying. You also wouldn’t get any necessary security fixes or necessary updates for changes elsewhere (such as digital certificates, changes to adapt to Roon cloud server changes, or adaptions to API changes by Roon’s partners such as MusicBrainz, Tivo, Tidal, Qobuz, etc)
However, you can’t prevent updates on the iPad (except if you disable ALL updates in the App Store), so incompatibilities would occur over time if the server doesn’t update but the iPad app did.
So all in all this would be a bad idea. In any case, on balance things get better with updates, even if there is an occasional minor issue.
I don’t know which change exactly it was on the iPad that helped, but if you had to change the wifi privacy setting from Random to Fixed or Off, this is generally recommended on private networks because otherwise the device identifies with a rotating, random MAC address. The Random setting helps against device tracking on untrusted networks, but the same restriction of tracking can cause discovery issues with home servers and the like.
If the critical change was the turning-off-and-back-on of Roon’s local network access rights on the iPad, this has more to do with Apple’s draconian security.
Although, personally I never have any such issues, so if this happens again, it might still be worthwhile to investigate if everything’s healthy on your network.
Well, your subsequent replies to support’s posts happened on a Saturday, and support doesn’t work on weekends, so I helped out to get you going.