Ralph, I certainly hope that your USB cable does not interfere with the product I intend to introduce in about 4 weeks, my Iron Balls.
When you consider the simple electron, it’s painfully obvious that this sub-atomic particle is essentially a mindless automaton, guided in its wanderings by magnetic force lines. And these magnetic force lines are generated by the continuous flow of molten impure iron in the outer core of the earth. As it turns out, some years ago the elemental iron mined from a particular site in Outer Mongolia was found to be quantum-entangled with this molten iron deep below the earth’s crust, iron in constant movement to generate the Earth’s near-miraculous magnetic field which shields us from so many of nature’s harsh realities in the form of ionic particles showering upon this world from the vast nuclear furnace we call “the Sun”.
And, of course, our transmission of audio signals, both ANALOG AND DIGITAL, are also affected by these magnetic lines, a fact readily acknowledged by any with a minimal scientific education. Since the molten core of the Earth is not readily accessible, there’s little an audiophile can do about the magnetic field generated thereby.
Until now, that is.
My Iron Balls are machined from ore taken from that singular Mongolian quarry.* Due to the quantum entanglement, appropriately positioning these Balls around your stereo equipment** may produce startling improvements in SQ, particularly if you use enough of the Balls to effect a significant change. To assist in their positioning, I will also be offering a handheld precision measurement analyzer, for a low introductory price of $2995, which assists in assessing the efficacy of a particular arrangement, for those who aren’t confident of their innate abilities to assess this.
Naturally, the difficulties in procuring this ore, and the cost of precision machining, will mean that the price of even one Ball will be out of the reach of the mere hobbyist and Spotify user. But true audiophiles will immediately perceive the value of taking out a second mortgage to secure a sufficient quantity for their listening zones.
More when we are closer to launch!
[* Note that some Balls may be made from local materials.]
[** Use of the Balls in such a way as to cause falls, trips, or comical mishaps of any sort that result in damage to persons, pets, or property is strictly forbidden by the EULA. The Company cannot be responsible for any use of the Balls in violation of the EULA.]