Hi @phil_hebden — Thank you for the post and sharing your feedback with us. Clearly you have had a rough go at it and I am sorry to hear of the frustrations.
Obviously if your mind is made up and you’ve come to the conclusion that Roon is not best suited for you there is not much more myself or the rest of the support team can offer in the way of help. But if you are willing to work with us and investigate the possible causes of these issues I am certain we can get you to a point where you will be happy again.
Remember we have thousands of users running various setups and configurations so we know these things work, we just need to determine why your experience has been different from others.
If you would like to work through these issues you are experiencing the best starting place is to get some details about your setup as other in this thread have already started to inquire about (thanks everyone 
). With this in mind may I very kindly ask you to please provide me with the following information:
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Please provide a brief but accurate description of your current setup using this link as a guide.
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Please describe your network configuration/topology being sure to provide insight into any networking hardware you are currently implementing. I want to have a clear understanding as to how your devices are communicating and all the tools involved with making those connection possible.
Looking forward to hearing from you,
-Eric