Since moving to ROCK/MOCK on a Lenovo M93 i5 tiny I have experienced zero issues. I had previously run server on Ubuntu on a 2012 Mac Mini and had the occasional hiccup.
ROCK is very small footprint and very, very stable
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go all the way to ROCK and your issues will go away. I too used a Mac mini 8gb and it was problematic with memory. I put the ROCk in 6 months ago and I haven’t had a single problem. Also, create an additional profile for your wife and she’ll love it.
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Rock is much more stable , much more responsive. I just forget about Rock in a good way.
Only glitch so far it lost my physical music library on NAS.
Turned off and on again and all fixed.
I would never go back to running Anything but Rock for Roon.
My Rock nuc just sits on the back of my computer monitor so zero footprint.
Regards
Andrew
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FWIW - I have not noticed any difference between my iMac M1 16GB and my newish Nucelus. (standard model - not plus)
ROCK is a 10.
I can’t compare ROCK with other platforms due to very limited experience, I can say that my NUC11i7 running ROCK is … well … a rock 
It has never caused any issues and has required practically zero intervention.
Incidentally, with the decision to drop the term ‘core’ in favour of ‘server’, are we going to see ‘ROCK’ rebranded as ‘ROSK’ ( ‘Roon Optimised Server Kit’). I hope not - somehow it does not work as well.
I have used a ROCK NUC since it was generally released and a Windows RoonServer. (Note, Enterprise Edition version of Windows so no garbage) - side by side for well over half a decade. Both have been equally solid.
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You are writing that nothing else in running on your MBPro, what did you mean, are there specific settings to turn things off?